Your Husband Is Your Lord
In 1857, Erastus Snow taught that women cannot enter heaven without their husband's approval, declaring 'he is her lord.' Women who honor their husbands insufficiently deserve 'a worse one.'
Audio coming soon
The Quote
“No woman will get into the celestial kingdom, except her husband receives her, if she is worthy to have a husband; and if not, somebody will receive her as a servant.” — Erastus Snow, JoD 5:291 (October 4, 1857)
“…reverence her husband as her lord; for he is her lord. Will she ever have another? No, never; and if she ever expects to have another, she has not learned ‘Mormonism’ aright. She may tear herself loose from him and attach another, but she may have a worse one: she ought to have a worse one. If she cannot learn to honour him, the next one she gets, if she is permitted to have another, ought to be a worse one.” — Erastus Snow, JoD 5:291 (October 4, 1857)
Lyrics
Coming Soon
Historical Context
The Setting: October 4, 1857 — The Bowery, Salt Lake City. The Utah Reformation is in full swing, a period of intense religious revival emphasizing obedience and rededication. This sermon was delivered just three weeks after the Mountain Meadows Massacre.
The Speaker: Erastus Snow — Apostle of the LDS Church (1849-1888), one of the original Mormon pioneers and a prominent leader in early Utah.
The Doctrine: Snow teaches that:
- Women cannot enter the celestial kingdom without their husband’s approval
- Women must reverence their husbands “as their lord”
- If a woman cannot “honour” her husband properly, she deserves a worse one
- Women who are “not worthy to have a husband” will be received “as a servant”
Modern Context: The LDS Church today emphasizes partnership in marriage, though temple ceremonies still include language about wives “hearkening” to husbands that was modified in 2019.
Lyric-to-Source Mapping
| Lyric | Source | Type |
|---|---|---|
| Coming Soon |
Addressing Apologetic Responses
“This was just one man’s opinion”
Erastus Snow was an Apostle speaking in General Conference. He explicitly connects this to temple requirements (“you never got into the celestial kingdom without the aid of your husband”) and frames it as “Mormonism aright.”
“He was speaking figuratively about Christ”
Snow distinguishes between God the Father (whom we pray to) and the husband (whom women must reverence as “lord”). He says women should pray for their husbands “that he may have the inspiration of the Almighty to lead and govern his family as the lord.”
“The church has moved on from this”
The 2019 temple ceremony changes removed some “obey” language, but only after 162 years. The historical teaching remains: early LDS leaders taught women’s salvation depended on male approval.
“Context of the times”
This defense admits prophets reflect their culture rather than transcend it. Why should women have trusted their eternal salvation to men’s cultural biases?
For those who were told their worth depended on a man’s approval.